Last Updated on September 14, 2020 by Brittany
As women, we have this crazy idea that we must sacrifice ourselves for everyone else! Let me be the first to say that YES as women we play so many roles in life however, we were not put on this planet to completely exhaust ourselves to the point of destruction. There is almost this unspoken truth in today’s society that if (as a woman) you put yourself first then you are being selfish… That could not be farther from the truth!
The truth is that when you put yourself first you are being selfless. Yep! Putting yourself first is a crucial part of self-care that better helps you care for others. When you pour from a full cup you are better for everyone around you which in turn is more beneficial to the ones you love.
So it’s time to change the thought process you may have had up until this point. Let’s discuss 5 simple ways to put yourself first without feeling guilty.
1.) Saying “NO” is okay.
Overwhelm is no fun! However, sometimes we place the burden on ourselves. Saying yes to too many commitments can leave us feeling worn down and straight-up raggedy. There are times where there are engagements we must not miss like a wedding, graduation, or anniversary although, there are many times when the opportunity will present itself again.
If your schedule is so full of to do’s that you have absolutely zero time to focus on anything pertaining to you then it’s time to make a change.
You must be very particular in what things you are willing to give your time too. Life is made up of time, and 24 hours a day is not going to change to 30 hours anytime soon. You must ensure that you are maximizing the most out of the hours you get in a day, and there must be a healthy balance in order to keep your sanity.
So if saying yes to a commitment is going to put you over the edge where you’re in a crappy mood, screaming at your husband or rolling your eyes at your kids it’s not WORTH IT! Using your power to say no to things that are not beneficial to you or your family should make this task easy and guiltless.
2.) Starting early is a great way to put yourself first.
One of the best ways to put yourself first is to start early. There is no need to feel guilt when you have started caring for yourself before anyone is even awake! Adding tasks to your morning self-care routine can start you off on the right foot, right out of the gate.
You won’t have to worry about fitting it in at the end of the day, or not at all if it is already done before the sun comes up. However, one of the important things to note is that you must incorporate this into your schedule daily. You must commit to making yourself a priority. It is just as important as anything else. This will ensure you can stick to your plan, and keep it going.
Not sure WHERE to start?Click Here!
3.) Boundaries baby!
Yep! We all need them because boundaries show others where the line in the sand is drawn. They also allow others to have a deeper respect for your limits.
Think about it…when you are always bending your own rules, and going back on your word people have a hard time believing you’re serious. If you tell somebody the best time to reach you is after six but keep taking their calls at 4:30 what are you really saying? You’re saying “yeah I told you my limits but I don’t even respect them myself!” So why would someone else?
The great thing about boundaries is that they are not saying “no” to giving something or someone your time.
Setting boundaries is saying this is important to me, and it is so important that I am willing to keep myself available for a certain period of time. However, if the respect is not reciprocated I must be able to say “no.”
You feel me?
You gotta talk the talk but also walk the walk. So you let people know what you are willing to put up with and show them you’re serious by keeping your foot down.
Trust me you won’t have a problem with anyone slipping through the cracks. Someone once told me…
“As soon as you let someone slide, they think they can ice-skate.” let that one sink in.
So just remember if someone is not able to respect your boundaries that’s on them not you.
No guilt here.
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4.) Setting goals will help you put yourself first.
Rome wasn’t built in a day and as women many times we put off major goals we want to achieve to be there for others. It many cases it is understandable because having a dream and a vision does require an above-average sacrifice. However, just because you have other responsibilities in no way means you must completely ditch your dreams.
Great things are achieved by small daily efforts, and it is important to understand that you must pursue your purpose in this world. It’s what the good Lord intended for you to do, and it is the only thing that will satisfy your spirit.
So set a long term goal, and break it down into small steps that you can include in your routine each day. Over time this will allow you to achieve the bigger things you want. It may take you a little longer but that’s okay. Trade expectation for appreciation and everything will change for you.
5.) Ask for help.
Trust me when I tell you I KNOW this one can be tough. We want to do it all, and sometimes we feel a complex when we have to tell someone we cannot do it all on our own.
Whoever you consider to be a team player in your life whether it’s your partner, mom, dad, sister, ask them for help from time to time.
It may be a temporary blow to your ego or a sign that you are overwhelmed but in the long run, it will benefit you.
Everyone needs a break, and everyone also deserves one. You are worthy of having time to enjoy and take care of yourself too. Never forget that!
Starting to put yourself first can be tricky in the beginning. However, the sooner you start implementing it into your daily self-care routine you will realize how beneficial it is.
You are worthy of all the same love, time, and attention, you sincerely give to everyone around you. The better you take care of yourself the better you can take care of others.
It is okay to consider yourself on the top of the to-do list just like you do everything else. You will make your self proud and set an example for all of those around you. You are important!
Until next time…
So Many Blessings,